The Triggers of PTSD From Infidelity

 Sensitive Senses After Betrayal

You are doing good. You're finally healing after the hurt. You can get out of bed again and not worry about it all. You get up to start your day; make yourself some coffee, turn on some music to get ready to clean and then that one song comes on. Instantly your heart sinks in your chest and beats so fast you think you just might pass out from it. That song might be a happy song that you've listened to a million times and enjoyed over and over but it just happens to be a song that was playing when trauma took place. Immediately it takes you to the place of the trauma and betrayal. It is a reminder each time you hear it of what you felt in that moment of hurt. I want to talk about the little things that trigger those moments in time and the haunting memories they bring up.

Sight

A picture, a person, a car, a building, a commercial on TV. Any of these things could be a trigger to your past pain. Sometimes all it takes is seeing something that brings up the emotions you experienced from your trauma to take you right back into that moment. For me, its the social media logos and any photo ever taken during that time period of when the infidelity was taking place. I see the person he was when I look at these photos. Even his eyes hold something in the photo that hurts me. The sight of the social media logos I see any time we are around friends that use those apps or the ones I see ads for when I'm just scrolling online. The eyes see things that pierce the heart and cause pain.

Sound

The sound of a loud pickup truck driving by, the notification sounds from these apps that were once used sounding off all around me in today's society, the music that was playing when this or that happened to me. Sound can be powerful in bringing up old feelings. But silence, that can hurt too. It reminds of the times the phone went off but you couldn't hear it, the times we laid in bed and didn't speak. Sometimes the silence is so loud it hurts. Sometimes the choice of words used that you've heard time and time again like "It's nothing." Sounds and silence can trigger you to the point of heartache.

Touch

The way his hands feel when they slide down my shoulders and back, the way his clothes feel, the way my clothes feel because the fabric on me reminds me of the time he hurt me. You remember in that moment what he was wearing when he said or did this and seeing yourself in the mirror with those clothes on remind you that trauma lives in the stitches of those clothes that no amount of laundry detergent could ever wash out. 

Taste

Your once favorite ice cream flavor or drink you enjoyed or the fact that the very first week you found out about it you had tacos and for a while the thought of eating them made you physically sick and emotionally broken. I know that sounds silly but trauma creates details in your memory that you may never forget. 

Smell

The smell of that particular cologne, the air freshener being sprayed in the house, the smell of the shampoo you used during that week the betrayal happened again. The smell of the car freshener that was hanging on the mirror when you were fighting in the driveway. 

When someone has experienced trauma or betrayal, the five senses can become portals to pain, unexpectedly reopening wounds thought to be healed. A scent reminiscent of a moment of heartbreak, the brush of fabric that mirrors a past embrace, the sound of a voice or a song once cherished—all have the power to trigger emotional memories etched deep within. Trauma doesn’t just linger in the mind; it imprints on the body, stored like echoes within our sensory experience. Betrayal, especially, leaves a residue where once there was trust, and sensory cues can reactivate feelings of fear, confusion, or grief. Yet in these awakenings, we’re reminded of our need for sacred healing—a place where even what hurts can be sanctified through grace. 

“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” — Psalm 56:8 (NLT)

This verse reminds us that nothing escapes God’s notice—not even the silent screams triggered by a smell, a sound, or a subtle touch. It suggests that our sensory responses to trauma are not weaknesses to be ashamed of, but sacred evidence of where healing is still unfolding.